The Soulful Atom

Rain drops and storms..
cool mild summer breeze..
Heavy headily earth perfumed air..
Crashing winds and blowing hair..
Steaming tea and rain lashing at the windows or clear onto the face.. :) :)
Warm dark room closed curtains and rain raging outside..
Caught unawares on the bike and ripping off the rain-coat..
Soaking the soul in the soothing wetness..
Drowning in its arms and yet floating above everything else..
Rain my love.. When are you coming?
Another year has gone by.. we await you.. Your earth and me.. :) :)
Enough of the wait already.. Come soooooooon!!!!!!

A gift..
I got u a gift.. All wrapped up and complete with a bow..
My heart and my soul wrapped up in the flesh of my dignity topped with a bow of my bloodied tears cause- water is worthless now..
Just for you.. n your kin..
To be stomped on and spat on..
My very soul wrapped up in the skin of all my dignity and filled with all my love..
Or whatever remains of it..
Cause this is what you wanted..
Cause this is what you wished..
Cause it cant get better than this or bigger..
Cause I've loved you.. unlike you..
And will till death and beyond..
So, here is your gift..
A little before time..
I hope you will enjoy it.. I know you have already enjoyed it..
You and your kin.
Happy birthday- in advance.. cause some things cannot wait.

They are aware of everything.. They maybe taught to do certain things in a certain way, but their true nature never remains hidden. They do not lie and they do not cheat. No matter what kind of household they are in, not matter the lies and plotting that goes around them they are always pure. They recognize good in the strangest of stranger.. They have no boundaries and they love completely.. They recognize truth and beauty and purity.. There is something about them.. :) Closest thing we have to the innocence and purity of god.. Like from the animal song.. Animals and children tell the truth they never lie.. which one is more human there's a thoughts now you decide.. :) :)
If your dog doesn't like someone, there is a good reason you shouldn't either.. and if you dog adores someone and "humans" around you don't then there is a good reason to think twice who you live with!! :) :)
Something about them that is just amazingly awesome! :D muuuaaaah to all them animals!! The messiahs of truth and beauty.. and if you have an animal around you your lies and betrayals will be punished.. be it cats or dogs or cows or pigs.. Lets learn truth from them.. Let us learn to love.. So many years of being humans and some of us still have no clue whats it all about! So many years of lessons and still people make silly rules which take them no where and only in depth of despair eventually resorting to alcohol and dragging their families kids in that darkness too!!
I wonder what kind of mothers they are who ensure their kids lie and live a life full of lies! Does motherhood only span across the children who have come from your womb? Some mother don't even care for their own children and only when its in time of need do they turn to their so called children and make their life a mess too! Do we really call such women mothers and respect them for motherhood? Maybe for struggling through whatever issues like any other human but not for being a mother.. Such women are not mothers.. They are just wombs..
Its about time we learn to look with open eyes, listen and understand not just blindly follow..
Look at the animals.. There's a LOT to learn! :)

Love.. in its entirety is capable of more than any other emotion in the world.. To be constructive to build to nurture to heal.. Love.. in its purest form can forgive any crime done by the subject of its expression.. But what about the crimes and atrocities done against it?
If love can be Durga it can also be Kali.. And it will be Kali when it is abused, not by words.. cause words are just that.. When love is abused by actions.. By disrespect by insults.. It becomes poison.. and it eats itself up.. its causes harm and hurt to the ones who have abused it taken it for granted.. but while doing so it causes itself more hurt cause in there is not joy no victory in hurting the one it loves..
A love's voyage was yet to begin when it was demolished by abuse.. not verbal or physical harm but through actions of disrespect and insult. Love is all forgiving and it has forgiven but is this the journey that love has to endure? That it be constantly attacked and misunderstood and lied to and taken for granted? is this what love deserves after giving everything possible to give and bearing such huge amounts of insults at the hands of the one it loves.. it still forgives and gets more pain and insults in return? What sort of people are these? who plot and plan to hurt something so pure? To drive it to such a place where it no sense of self or boundaries remains.. Only remains the desperate desire for peace and freedom from the clutches so such people who are blind? Who are so blinded by god alone knows what that they can't see, they can't hear, they can't feel love.. compassion.. Is everything really dead?
Is this how the voyage of love ends? Before it has even started? Or is this the actual voyage?
Wish i had answers to the mystery of love.. To the feel which conquers everything.. religion, society, human emotions, hurt, insult, boundaries.. Nothing stands in its way.. But this journey is one person's the one who feels it. If it is reciprocated then it wins. But if its not then the voyage continues like an exile.. Alone..
Its a curse that love has to face to be alone.. But the strength of love conquers all.. even the person who feels it.. And this is the voyage of love. A day comes when these people understand and repent. I hope it doesn't happen too late.. Or maybe it is already too late.. Is it ever too late when it comes to love? Maybe not.. love is timeless.. but when it bleeds it is not the same anymore.. it needs love back.. If not the voyage continues.. Cause once you have something so pure there is no escape.. Think of it as a curse or a boon.. Its yours and it will never go away even if you think it has.. Thats the voyage of love.. To stay.. Beyond everything and anything..

Good bye my darling my love.. my companion..
Farewell.. you shall forever be within me..
But i have to let go now.. its time to part..
For im dead within.. maybe someday our paths will cross..
Maybe they won't.. good bye my dear.. my darling blog..
Goodbye CP and BP and good bye my little atom..
I silence you cruelly..
Forgive my sins..
I love you.. but i have to say goodbye..

I love you BP and CP!! :* just re-read my first post ever and fell in love all over again! :D
I love myself.. no matter how much people try to make me hate myself i still adamantly stubbornly keep falling in love over n over again.
I'm my own hero, my own prince charming n my own savior.. my guarding angel must be lying somewhere in a hangover so i'm my own guardian angel too!! :D
I love myself, i love CP and BP.. and in loving these i love those i love much more.. :)
It is difficult to understand my perspectives about a variety of things, so i've come to understand. Some people understand some of them and then not the others.. and some people don't understand anything altogether!
I believe that if one can't love oneself one is not capable of loving anyone else.. and then all these so called declarations of love are untrue.. Sacrifice is never really a sacrifice it is the capability to love oneself so much that the immediate goal is rejected for something bigger for oneself.. Its never for others it always for oneself..
Anyhow lets not digress from the main topic into some "crappy" philosophy of mine ;)

Its great being in love.. specially in love with oneself! I love you :)

CP- no work? wish you would give me some work atleast!
BP- YAYAYAYAYAYAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! partahhhyyiiii..... baby.. ilu ilu ilu ilu toooooooo three much much.. :D :*

*CP rolling eyes* *BP kissing her away* :D
I love these two they are so cute!! muaaaaaaaaaah guys thanks for making my day!!!