The Soulful Atom

Was talking to a friend recently about the various strange happenings in life of late. So much has happened in past few weeks, it has changed me completely. The has been happiness and pain, a lot of it. Talking about pain, we thought it would be good not to think of things which bring nothing but pain..
It lead me to wonder how people deal with pain. They say, pain is better when shared (a famous hindi saying "dukh baatne se kaam hota hai") I wondered if it applies every time. Mostly does. you do feel better when you talk things out.. But that applies to everything, not only pain..
For me, pain is like the grass that cows eat.. The just swallow it up as and when they find it.. Chew a bit sometimes if the pieces are to big to be gulped down. And then once they think the share of grass for that time is done, they walk, complete all other important daily tasks. They then find some place, some solace, a cool shade, they sit down, and slowly bring the grass out, and chew it silently, slowly.. Savoring each piece of it.. That is what pain is for me.. Taking it all in the time it comes.. That is "getting over fast" for me. People say i get over things very fast, i felt so too, until now.. I realised how i function when it comes to pain. I feel one can never get over anything. Shards remain lodged in the heart for as long as the heart can feel anything.. any emotion at all.. Till then these memories, the pain felt back then, when the thing happened, will always remain with you. It might be like a dull throb once in a while.. but its there always..

Pain should be felt all alone, how much ever they say its better to share pain. What is the point of pain then? He is not meant to make you feel good, so why share him? I'd rather drown myself in his embrace.. For as long as he wants to have me.. Let him abuse me, cut me to pieces.. And i know he will come around, he will be the one who will glue me together again.. though he has his selfish motives.. I'm happy being with him alone.. Experiencing him all for myself.. Cause that is how its meant to be! So i hoard pain till the time i feel i have the mind/heart space, that i'm ready to feel him completely.. And then i let myself go.. let him consume me.. And then i come alive..

Thats pain redefined.. One of the most lively emotions, most complete in every aspect, pain can never be incomplete in any sense, and faithful.. :) Pain..