The Soulful Atom

Reflecting over life through weird, crazy, ever changing, euphoric, absurd, confused and at times impartial lenses -a journey of curiosity and questions with my two alter egos.. as I try to fall out of the stagnation of instability.. or the desperate attempt to remain..

Fallin over, apart, all over!!

WHY! does it happen that just when things seem to be going alright.. Just taking baby steps towards being alright, do they have to fall over?!! Like completely fall apart?!!? Be it relations, work, studies!! anything!! It seems like a bug that i've caught on to of late!! :( Just too frustrating when things are about to reach a certain point before they just collapse!!!! i mean fine if something goes wrong on the way.. you can set it right.. but everything is going fine.. and exactly at the last moment it goes completely haywire! :O i mean WHY!! :O :O :( GGGRRRRrrrrr.. trying hard to not let these things get to me, and affect my moods making them even worse than before.. but just cannot help taking things out from office! :( :( it will get back alright.. can be properly mended.. but why should it go wrong in the first place!! so many efforts.. wish i could've been more careful.. hating every bit of this carelessness.. :( hope i can do better here on.. :( :(
Just about EVERYTHING is falling apart.. even apart from work.. Just after making certain decision.. and trying to stick to them.. Why is this sadness loneliness just waiting to grope at me? its obscene the way it comes charging and takes control of everything inside..
How much ever you try.. to just be.. to stick to decision why do they always go out of hand? if its a test i do not want to give it. im not prepared.
the bitter taste of things falling apart stays on.. :( :( why?

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