The Soulful Atom

I know its not the first time im writing bout "confusion", i'd even say that the theme of the blog is it! But since recently i've been drifting away from it.. or so i thought.. BANG! its back again.. to rid me of all clarity and take me into depths of contemplation.. And not about myself but about someone very special. It must be the first time i'm sure about myself.. But after certain incidents, im not sure about the other person.. The one i knew was as certain as i was.. Where do these gaps creep up from? Could a certain facet of a person's behavior, which is already well known, affect the other person's feelings/behavior/outlook so badly?? Now when it has, how am i supposed to behave? When the person behaves perfectly fine one instance and behaves as if i do not exist the next? Is asking for an explanation wrong when you are at that level in a relationship? I made mistakes, i was shown had it hurt, i apologized and i'm trying to make it up to the person, but wouldn't you expect some sort of support from that person taking into account the feelings and conscious decisions.. How can you make someone understand that when somethings are said in a fit of anger, they do not mean anything, i agree it hurts like crazy.. But when i try to amend my actions, when i try to explain this to them, why cannot they understand that its the things said in the right state of mind that matter.. Why do they choose to ignore this fact, and not give me even a chance to correct myself? Why do they keep holding to the negative things and not see what they have now? What am i supposed to do then? How can i try and make it upto someone who doesn't seem to want it? Do i just bid my time doing nothing? How can i do that, when i cannot see people i love in so much pain, and that too cause of me.. I feel i should just carry on ignoring the obvious gaps, and behave as if everything is normal, and try and make it upto that person, but what should i do when the person does not wish to receive it?? What should i do?? So this time the confusion is not about what i feel.. but about what i should do to make someone realise this.. Wish i could just make them see.. wish they would be ready to see what i am showing.. its all there and yet they do not wish to see.. what should i do about this? and when they say nothing has changed at the base, then why do they behave like this? Such confusion.. no anger no hate.. just confusion and a slight sense of despair.. but the desire to make it all work.. cause its meant to be.. :)