The Soulful Atom

It feels like something from another lifetime. It was strong. atleast felt so that point of time.. almost 6 years now.. People change a lot, i accept that. But then was what they showed that time true at all? Because now which can be seen doesn't add up. Maybe cause they changed yet again? There were promises made and actions taken supposedly, but no proof provided when asked for. I continued to believe words taking people at face value, though something kept nagging at the side, and hence the need for proof. The trust was lost when some things were found out back then. But love was still there and so the need for reassurance arose. Anyway, in all these muddy waters of true and lies, the grayness of all, the stuff which was left unsaid, and perhaps the lies which were spoken, we need to take a call about what we need to or have to do. Its the same thing as letting go or holding on. We would never know if it would've worked on had we held on a little more. We don't even know if whats being shown now is the truth. Perhaps they too chose to take a call which was much different from yours? It gives immense joy to see people happy even if they have hurt you to kingdom come. I've always prayed for everyone to get the things which i never got, hoping that atleast my prayers would come true for them. Though the pain remains its lessened by the fact that if they can be, perhaps some day i would too.
So, again, going ahead assuming and taking things at face value is what helps. I believe what i see, its much less painful than trying to decipher the truth, which again is multifaceted. I've always ached due to the fact that they got something which i so badly wanted from exactly those people i wanted it from! But thats life. I know what i need to do but somehow i've been scared or perhaps too lazy to change my ways.
But this is where i get my closure finally. After 6 long years. Of which you know nothing, though i always thought you understood even when there was no contact. But thank you for putting up these posts that you have. Its nice to finally see it for myself :)
For me what i felt was beyond anything i had ever felt, like i always told you.
Its nice that the same issues which i face, sleeplessness, restlessness are being addressed for someone else if not me. It gives me hope that one day they will be. If not by someone else then by my own self.
I feel like some kind of a magnet for same kind of boys/men. Cause i know for a fact that not all men lie. I've seen truthful ones around, though never with me. I get the liars. :) But that will change soon. Cause closure is what I'm getting now. Not only from you but all the others too.
Things that i've held on to so tightly are now loosening up and dispersing away in the wind.. Its a little sad but a lot refreshing..And so is seeing you happy. Cause no matter how badly people behave they do deserve to be happy, cause possibly some point of time in life they did make someone else happy and for other nice characteristics that they have as people. Hoping that the lies would stop in your life and everyone else's.
So here's assuming again that what i see and hear is the truth. Since i wear no masks i assume no one else does, be it at my detriment. Truth and honesty are the biggest strengths there ever were.